The Chamber Keeper is working on his best of 2008 lists, so he has just a couple of films to review before the stroke of midnight.
Secrets of the Clown
Year: 2008
Director: Ryan Badalament
Stars: Michael Kott, Kelli Clevenger, Susie Christine
Studio: Brain Damage Films
MPAA Ratting: Not Rated
Running Time: 95 Mins
Official Website: http://www.secretsoftheclown.com/
"Secrets of the Clown” is a film that was recently on ten worst films list for 2008.
The film is about, a guy who witnesses the brutal murder of his best friend. Things get worse for him, when he starts seeing nightmarish visions of the people he loves, as he can see their deaths. As that begins to destroy his life, his girlfriend grows more distant of him, as she has a dark secret about her past. Soon, he is going to discover that the all the secrets lie in a harmless clown doll. Can he find out those secrets, before he ends up dead.
“Secrets of the Clown" was, flat-out, a boring horror film that felt like a soap opera with the pace of the film. The directing, which was done by Ryan Badalamenti, was very dull. One of the reasons it felt that way was the fact that the characters were just plain boring. For horror films to be interesting, the characters must be lively and somewhat exciting to watch. Also, Badalamenti has no sense in getting any good performances for his actors, as they were flat, because they had no personality to them. Some of that has to go to the fact that the acting here was just horrible. At times the acting in this film felt like amateur hour, as they made them silly for all the wrong reasons. They were either annoying or the fact that they didn’t make their characters interesting enough to make me care about them. He really needs to improve on that, if he makes a second film.
The screenplay, which was written by Badalamenti, was worse than his direction. This film had some horrible dialogue, which made me think that I was watching amateur hour instead of watching a horror film. It felt cheesy and made the film's flaws very noticeable to the film fan that doesn’t understand various flaws that films can have. It’s not the film’s main problem, as there’s more. The whole story was completely flawed. First, the love story subplot was boring. I was never interested because the characters and the relationship felt lifeless. I never cared about it. Secondly, there was no development whatsoever. He never spends any time developing the characters or secondary characters, which made this very boring. Finally, this film felt like a typical boring slasher film where it’s only purpose was to see how much blood to get onscreen rather that creating conflict, which make horror films very fun to watch. This was not a fun film to watch by any stretch of the imagination.
Secrets of the Clown are some secrets that you will not want to discover.
Review Rating: Zero Stars.
Maniac on the Loose
Year: 2008
Director: Steve Hudgins
Stars: Nick Faust, Steve Hudgins, Jessica Cook
Studio: Big Biting Pig Productions
MPAA Ratting: Not Rated
Running Time: 94 Mins
The film is about, a guy who witnesses the brutal murder of his best friend. Things get worse for him, when he starts seeing nightmarish visions of the people he loves, as he can see their deaths. As that begins to destroy his life, his girlfriend grows more distant of him, as she has a dark secret about her past. Soon, he is going to discover that the all the secrets lie in a harmless clown doll. Can he find out those secrets, before he ends up dead.
“Secrets of the Clown" was, flat-out, a boring horror film that felt like a soap opera with the pace of the film. The directing, which was done by Ryan Badalamenti, was very dull. One of the reasons it felt that way was the fact that the characters were just plain boring. For horror films to be interesting, the characters must be lively and somewhat exciting to watch. Also, Badalamenti has no sense in getting any good performances for his actors, as they were flat, because they had no personality to them. Some of that has to go to the fact that the acting here was just horrible. At times the acting in this film felt like amateur hour, as they made them silly for all the wrong reasons. They were either annoying or the fact that they didn’t make their characters interesting enough to make me care about them. He really needs to improve on that, if he makes a second film.
The screenplay, which was written by Badalamenti, was worse than his direction. This film had some horrible dialogue, which made me think that I was watching amateur hour instead of watching a horror film. It felt cheesy and made the film's flaws very noticeable to the film fan that doesn’t understand various flaws that films can have. It’s not the film’s main problem, as there’s more. The whole story was completely flawed. First, the love story subplot was boring. I was never interested because the characters and the relationship felt lifeless. I never cared about it. Secondly, there was no development whatsoever. He never spends any time developing the characters or secondary characters, which made this very boring. Finally, this film felt like a typical boring slasher film where it’s only purpose was to see how much blood to get onscreen rather that creating conflict, which make horror films very fun to watch. This was not a fun film to watch by any stretch of the imagination.
Secrets of the Clown are some secrets that you will not want to discover.
Review Rating: Zero Stars.
Maniac on the LooseYear: 2008
Director: Steve Hudgins
Stars: Nick Faust, Steve Hudgins, Jessica Cook
Studio: Big Biting Pig Productions
MPAA Ratting: Not Rated
Running Time: 94 Mins
“Maniac on the Loose is about a mental patient, who is described as dangerous, escapes from psychiatric hospital. The doctor (Nick Faust) in charge of the hospital is fearful of losing his job, so he attempts to cover up the escape and starts to look for him without the cooraporation of the authorities. Soon, it will drive him crazy, as the killer is on the loose.
“Maniac on the Loose” is a film that I really wanted to like, but can’t. Writer/Director Steve Hudgins direction was good. I liked how he makes this film look professional, as the film didn’t look amateurish at all. Hudgins does a good job giving the film it’s very dark and sinister tone. Amidst its problems, there are ingredients there for an effective film. He also did a good job directing his actors. The actors did try their best to save this film from its bad screenplay, which I’ll talk about in a minute. I liked how they played their characters very well. It really kept my interest when the film’s story was going south.
But what made me not want to recommend this film was the fact the screenplay and story was bad. For the first fifteen minutes of the film, I was into the film’s story. That was until the story started to cut away from the abduction to the hospital scenes. This is when the film started to get out of control. The hospital scenes really slowed down the film. It slowed down the film, because the action was getting intense when we are treated to scenes with the absent-minded doctor who is trying to cover-up the whole thing. It really made the film very dull. But my major complaint is the numerous character twists. After the second twist, the film just went completely south, as I lost all interest for the film. The twists were silly, as they were pretty much repetitive, not scary or shocking. It also doesn’t make you interested in any of the film’s characters.
This is a film that clearly needed a major rewrite. “Maniac on the Loose” has twists that make the logic of the film silly and not scary or shocking.
“Maniac on the Loose” is a film that I really wanted to like, but can’t. Writer/Director Steve Hudgins direction was good. I liked how he makes this film look professional, as the film didn’t look amateurish at all. Hudgins does a good job giving the film it’s very dark and sinister tone. Amidst its problems, there are ingredients there for an effective film. He also did a good job directing his actors. The actors did try their best to save this film from its bad screenplay, which I’ll talk about in a minute. I liked how they played their characters very well. It really kept my interest when the film’s story was going south.
But what made me not want to recommend this film was the fact the screenplay and story was bad. For the first fifteen minutes of the film, I was into the film’s story. That was until the story started to cut away from the abduction to the hospital scenes. This is when the film started to get out of control. The hospital scenes really slowed down the film. It slowed down the film, because the action was getting intense when we are treated to scenes with the absent-minded doctor who is trying to cover-up the whole thing. It really made the film very dull. But my major complaint is the numerous character twists. After the second twist, the film just went completely south, as I lost all interest for the film. The twists were silly, as they were pretty much repetitive, not scary or shocking. It also doesn’t make you interested in any of the film’s characters.
This is a film that clearly needed a major rewrite. “Maniac on the Loose” has twists that make the logic of the film silly and not scary or shocking.
You can purchase this film at: http://www.bigbitingpigproductions.com/maniac_on_the_loose.html
Review Rating: 2 Stars.
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Until then, have a frightening and safe New Year.
The director of "Secrets of the Clown" is Ryan Badalament, not Clint Hutchison.
Sorry about that. I'll make sure that doesn't happen again.
As for punishment, I owe myself another viewing of "One Missed Call" aka. One and a half Missed Hours of My Life