Anchor Bay Films also send us over news about the upcoming DVD release of "Detention of the Dead". The film has played at such horror film festivals as FrightFest, Glasgow Film Festival and HorrorHound Weekend. It stars Jacob Zacher (“Greek”), Alexa Nikolas (“The Walking Dead”), Christa B. Allen (“Revenge”), Jayson Blair (“The New Normal”), Justin Chon (the Twilight franchise) and Max Adler (“Glee”).

Special features on the DVD include audio commentary by Writer/Director Alex Craig Mann and “Detention of the Dead: Behind The Scenes” featurette. "Detention of the Dead" hits stores on June 18th.

Press Release:

Anchor Bay Entertainment holds everyone after class with the July 23rd DVD release of Detention of the Dead. Already a hit at such festivals as FrightFest, Glasgow Film Festival and HorrorHound Weekend, this side-splitting mix of zombies and teen-angst stars Jacob Zacher (“Greek”), Alexa Nikolas (“The Walking Dead”), Christa B. Allen (“Revenge”), Jayson Blair (“The New Normal”), Justin Chon (the Twilight franchise) and Max Adler (“Glee”). The SRP for the DVD is $19.98. The pre-book is June 26th. In addition, fans will be able to experience Detention of the Dead on the big screen at selected theaters nationwide on June 28th. The student body-feast will also be available On Demand starting June 18th.

THE BREAKFAST CLUB meets ZOMBIELAND in this head-busting zombedy. A group of teenagers trapped in detention, fight for survival after their classmates turn into a ravenous zombie horde. Can a cheerleader, a stoner, a jock, a bully, a goth, and a nerd put aside their differences for one night to take on the undead? Will they live to see the morning? Fat chance! This is High School after all.

Bonus features include audio commentary by Writer/Director Alex Craig Mann and “Detention of the Dead: Behind The Scenes” featurette.

Detention of the Dead will delight fans and create a new generation of zombie fans!

Image Entertainment has send us over information for one of their upcoming DVD releases "State of Emergency". The zombie horror film stars Jay Hayden (A Warrior’s Heart), Tori White (Silent Night) and Andy Stahl (The Blind Side).

Special Features on the DVD include two behind-the-scenes featurettes on the making of the movie and its visual effects, and deleted scenes. "State of Emergency" hits DVD on April 16th.

Press Release:

A bio-plant explosion will forever change the dynamic of a small country town. A man will be forced to kill those very people he once held dear. On April 16th, Image Entertainment challenges you to escape zombie-ridden Montgomery County with the release of State of Emergency. This harrowing tale of survival amongst the undead is directed by Turner Clay (Interception) and stars Jay Hayden (A Warrior’s Heart), Tori White (Silent Night) and Andy Stahl (The Blind Side). Also available via digital download, the DVD release will have an SRP of $27.97, and pre-book is March 19th.

After an explosion unleashes the contents of a military bio-weapons plant, the unsuspecting populace is transformed into a roaming army of flesh-eating zombies. Trapped in the quarantine zone, Jim finds himself cut off, confused and fighting for his own survival. Contacted by a small band of others unaffected by the toxins, Jim sets out to reach their besieged warehouse. Becoming the survival group's de-facto leader, he struggles to keep order as they hunker down, fortify their stronghold and arm themselves against the attacking mutants. Fragmentary radio reports from outside hint at a last-ditch government rescue plan.

But can the survivors hold out until help arrives… or will they succumb to the living hell of an undead apocalypse? Will anybody survive?

Special features include two behind-the-scenes featurettes on the making of the movie and its visual effects, and deleted scenes.

Music Video Distribution has send us information for their upcoming releases "Bath Salt Zombies". This crazy film is latest film from "Puppet Monster Massacre" director Dustin Wayde Mills. The film features music from punk rock bands World War IX, The Dwarves, The Meatmen and more. "Bath Salt Zombies" hits DVD shelves on February 19th.

For more information on this film, you can visit the film's official website at: http://www.bathsaltzombies.com/

Press Release:

Bath Salt Zombies is a new horror film directed and co-written by Dustin Wayde Mills (Puppet Monster Massacre, Zombie A-Hole, Ballad of Skinless Pete) and produced and co-written by Clint Weiler of Aggronautix. The movie sensationalizes the recent bath salt epidemic and the attacks surrounding them.

"Although the film is somewhat of a black comedy, I wanted to portray the real power of drugs in a horror story... Dustin was able to pull it off with ease," said Weiler who wrote the treatment for the film and worked on the basic characterization.

"It's off the wall comic book insanity with blood, gore, nudity, martial arts, gunfights, and a mutant jack-chi," said Mills. "You should check your brain at the door and prepare to have your face melted off."

SYNOPSIS:

Present day, United States... The bath salts epidemic facing the southern and mid-western US has been stifled by an unprecedented government crackdown. Head shops have been raided and shut down, component imports from the UK, India and China have been completely stopped, and aggressive penalties for users have been instated. This has led to a tremendous amount of surplus stock hidden by black market dealers, and a migration of those dealers (and in turn, users) to the northeast and other areas. In New York City, potent strands have surfaced and have attracted the most devoted bath salt junkies. In an attempt to outsell said strands, a young aspiring chemist has developed and even stronger batch... but something has gone horribly wrong. The new ultra potent bath salt batch has revealed a major side effect... It turns users into violent flesh seeking "zombies." When the zombies are high on balt salts, they are completely unaware of their actions and they seem to float in and out of consciousness. When they kill / eat people, they are unaware of what has happened when they come down off the drug. The drug is also more addictive than other forms, and users feel the need to stay constantly high due to the fact they become incredibly feeble when sober. They come down HARD.

FACTS ABOUT THE BATH SALT EPIDEMIC:

Traditional "bath salts" consist of a combination of amphetamine-like chemicals, mainly mephedrone, MDPV and methylone. Users of the drug have reported feeling incredibly hot, which is why many get naked (in this case, it gives us cause for female nudity). They also develop superhuman strength (it can take five or six men to restrain them) and become so manic and delusional that the term "excited delirium" is being used by the medical community to describe their mental state. The shocking wave of attacks has sparked fears of a real-life zombie outbreak in the south. This led to The Center for Disease Control and Prevention releasing a statement saying it is not aware of any virus that can cause zombie-like behavior. A spokesman said: "MDPV is an illegal and harmful drug and stiff penalties are in place for people who possess or supply it. Drugs ruin lives which is why we are taking tough action against dealers and criminal gangs and helping people to free themselves from the cycle of dependency."

STARRING: Brandon Salkil, Josh Eal, Ethan Holey, Dave Parker, Jackie McKown, and more.

SOUNDTRACK:

World War IX - Bath Salt Zombies

The Dwarves - We Only Came To Get High

The Meatmen - Men, Meat and Fire

ANTiSEEN - One Shot, One Kill

Murder Junkies - Dopesick

World War IX - Bender Royale

Combat Crisis - Beating Post

American Speedway - Unreasonable Things

BugGiRL - Blood, Sweat, & Beers

The Gaggers - Hostage

DIRECTED BY
Julian Grant

STARRING
Brian Shaw - Yar
Kathleen Lawlor - Janice
Alden Moore - Hak
Almir Limaj - Stabber

Genre - Horror/Zombies/Infected

Running Time - 100 Minutes


PLOT
In a post-apocalyptic world, a virus outbreak has infected much of the human population, turning them into something like cannibalistic zombies. The government is hunting down those infected, killing them in order to solve the problem they probably created.

We follow one infected family headed by Yar (Brian Shaw), who tries to keep his pregnant wife (Alden Moore) and two children safe from being captured and killed. Knowing his family wants some human flesh, he goes hunting, finding a body inside a tent, not realizing that there are radioactive warnings all around the corpse. He lets his family take the corpse for dinner while passing on it and drinking from a liquor bottle the corpse had on him instead.

The next day, Yar finds out that his family are now incredibly sick, to the point that each one of them dies. Yar does manage to save his newborn son by literally extracting him from his wife's corpse. Yar realizes he's his son's only hope for a better future, leaving his family behind and looking for some sort of haven. Along the way, he saves an uninfected woman named Janice (Kathleen Lawlor), who was about to be murdered by two infected humans. Although they both seem untrusting of each other at first, Yar and Janice come to sort of a truce as he lets Janice help him with his son. Will these three be able to start a new family? Or are their fates doomed?

REVIEW

STORY - THE DEFILED is an interesting take on the overused and overexposed zombie film. Presented in an arthouse sort of way, THE DEFILED focuses on the zombie's [or infected person's, in this case] point of the view of the situation rather than a human. Instead of survivors scrambling together to make sure they survive the outbreak while bickering on a good plan, THE DEFILED lets us in on the world of the infected themselves, making us witness what they need to do in order to survive. They communicate like cavemen [losing all intelligent speak], hunt for human flesh, and eat it to survive. They also have to hide from those who created them, knowing that they're hunting them down like dogs. It's an original and fascinating concept that I'm really surprised other filmmakers haven't latched too much on, although some have created more intelligent zombies that interact like humans would [like in DAY OF THE DEAD, FIDO, and LAND OF THE DEAD].

THE DEFILED is also strong due to the fact that it has an infected character teaming up with a healthy human as they go on the run to protect themselves and Yar's newborn. As humans, we know another human is capable of love, protection, and the willingness to sacrifice themselves to save someone we deeply care for. But Yar's portrayal is more profound as, in a lot of ways, lost a lot of his human side due to this disease he's suffering from. His mind and behavior has degenerated into nothing but instinctual knowledge and feelings. He's like an animal in a lot of ways - doing anything to survive while remaining loyal to his family. The fact that Yar still has human feelings of compassion and love for his son is a great character trait and makes the audience support him throughout the film. It also makes his alliance with Janice more effective as even though they're now different, they both have the same feelings for each other and for the baby. It's a great display of showing that two different people, one diseased and the other not, are both the same. This gives the hunters more of a villain feel since they want to destroy this due to being afraid of the outbreak spreading, even though they were probably a part of it or working for those who were.

THE DEFILED also has to contend with the fact that there is no actual dialogue in the film at all. We do have music and the characters do grunt and yell at each other, but no actual words are spoken for 100 minutes. It's a big challenge to keep an audience invested in a story that doesn't involve emoting with words. Instead, the acting has to really make up for this. And while sometimes, dialogue could have helped during duller moments in the film, I appreciate the boldness by Julian Grant to let the visuals do the talking rather than the characters making up the film.

I will say that THE DEFILED did bore me a bit at times, especially after the hour mark where Yar and Janice are walking around to different places that don't really move the story forward. I understand these scenes were kept in to show what society and civilization now looks like due to this horrible outbreak, but the film wouldn't have changed much if taken out. In fact, I feel as if this great concept would have been more effective as a shorter film. With less focus on establishing this world and more focus on the character's journey for salvation in a desolate civilization, THE DEFILED would have gotten better praise from people. But the film does lose its momentum for a while in the second half, although the final act does make up for it somewhat. Still, trimming maybe 25 minutes wouldn't have hurt the film at all.

DIRECTION - Julian Grant does a really excellent job bringing his vision to life. While I already mentioned the uneven pacing with certain dull scenes that could have been edited out, the rest of the visuals work better than one would expect from a film like this. THE DEFILED is shaded with a blue-grey tint to give off a look that was inspired by NIGHT OF THE LIVING DEAD (1968) and CARNIVAL OF SOULS. It actually gives the make-up work and special effects done for the infected [created by Robert Kurtzman] a more old-school, creepy look that looked pretty convincing of their condition. There is a moment where the film does go into a reddish tint, but it's during a dream or flashback sequence or something. The cinematography and camera work is very nice. The editing is solid, although Grant likes to fade-in and fade-out a lot, which can be a bit distracting and annoying. I would have loved a dissolve every now and then. I do have to give credit to Grant for taking on an ambitious project and making it work for the most part. It'd be interesting to see what he can do with a bigger budget and some dialogue.

EDGE FACTOR - Language is N/A. There is a sex scene, but nothing that's graphic at all. As for the violence, there are gunshots and physical grappling. But it's pretty tame stuff considering the other opinions out there in this very sub-genre.

ACTING - There are really only two main actors in the film. Brian Shaw was excellent as Yar. His role involved a ton of body language and he used it really well to convey every emotion he had to portray without speaking. I thought he carried the film like a champ. Kathleen Lawlor was decent as Janice. She had good moments, but I wished she'd show more expression with her face. She usually had the same face for much of the film. But I thought the two had nice chemistry as they worked well off of each other.

SPECIAL FEATURES - The DVD for THE DEFILED comes with a few features. One is a feature-length commentary track with actors Brian Shaw and Kathleen Lawlor, pretty much giving audiences information about the film's production and discussing their time filming the movie. Other stuff includes "Slide Show", which is a 4-minute slideshow of stills from the film, "Home Movies", which is 2-minute test footage that's not really explained. And of course a trailer for the film itself.

THE FINAL HOWL
THE DEFILED is a film that's high on ambition and meets it for the most part. I still feel that this film would be stronger as a short, as the second half does drag on a bit without dialogue. But the film is unique and interesting enough for me to recommend it to those who want to see something different and more artsy done with the typical zombie film.

SCORE3 Howls Outta 4

DIRECTED BY
Steve O'Brien
Warren Speed

STARRING
Seymour Mace - Johnny Hellfire
Warren Speed - Pervo the Clown
Victoria Hopkins - Skye Brannigan
Victoria Broom - Rachel Brannigan
Marysia Kay - Red Zander
Peter Bonner - Zeus
Kate Soulsby - Harmony Starr
Bill Fellows - Henry Zander
Gillian Settle - Blue Zander
Christian Steel - Tycho Zander

Genre - Horror/Comedy/Zombies/Indie

Running Time - 85 Minutes


Have you ever wondered what type of women Satan is attracted to? I mean, does he fancy model-esque women, like Gisele Bundchen or Heidi Klum? Does he like bigger women, like Mo'Nique or Kirstie Alley? Maybe he likes men who dress like women, like RuPaul, who knows? What do you think?

Wait...you've never asked yourself these questions?

Do you want to know why?

Because NO ONE GIVES A BLOODY FOOK!

And neither do the creators of ZOMBIE WOMEN OF SATAN, where Satan doesn't even make an appearance or get a slight mention, even though his name is plastered to sell copies of this independent horror film from the great United Kingdom. You know what else the creators don't give a bloody fook about? A decent script, direction, or even entertaining its audience.

That's right, everyone. It's one of those reviews. The WTF? Vault is back after a six-month hiatus, ready to bite into this piece of zombie crap! God save the Queen...and my sanity!

PLOT
A group of traveling burlesque performers [Johnny Hellfire (Seymour Mace), Pervo the Clown (Warren Speed), Harmony Starr (Kate Soulsby), Zeus the dwarf (Peter Bonner), Damage (Joe Nicholson), and singer Skye Brannigan (Victoria Hopkins)] grab the attention of a really weird family, who seem to be inviting naive ladies to drink their Kool-Aid. The son, Tycho (Christian Steel), hosts an internet TV show and wants to interview the group. Unfortunately, things at the cult are taking a turn for the worse. It seems Tycho's father, Henry (Bill Fellows), is doing some experiments on these cult girls, turning them into zombies.

It seems that someone spiked the Kool-Aid with the zombie serum at one of the cult parties that occurred during the TV interview, turning all the cult members into blood-hungry zombies. Warned by his sisters Red (Marysia Kay) and Blue (Gillian Settle), Tycho locks the burlesque group inside the studio while he and his sisters deal with the problem. Unfortunately, Skye recognizes her long-lost sister Rachel (Victoria Broom) as one of the uninfected cult girls, giving her motivation to kill these zombies and rescue Rachel. The other members just try and survive while making the lamest jokes ever.

Where's that bomb from THE RETURN OF THE LIVING DEAD when you need it? It would have saved me 85 minutes of my life.

REVIEW
ZOMBIE WOMEN OF SATAN is a low budgeted horror film that was made by people who wanted to make a film for themselves and their friends, forgetting that an actual audience with some level of taste would be watching also. It's even more frustrating when the film has such a cool title and a concept that really is sure-fire for success, budget or not. But when you have incapable filmmakers behind-the-scenes, it all goes to poop.

The biggest culprit is the screenplay. I really don't know where to start because there's just so many things wrong with how the narrative is presented. I guess I can start with something positive and say that the narrative moves from a point A to a point B without confusing its audience. After all, ZOMBIE WOMEN OF SATAN is pretty much a movie where a man, thinking he's God, creates zombies who want to feed on innocent humans who'll kill them to survive. You really can't screw that up. Fortunately, Seymour Mace and Steve O'Brien make the main plot of the film understandable enough that we understand what's going on and accept things in context of the story. Unfortunately, that's as far as the plot development goes. The surface is fine, but there's no depth or meat to make anyone want to care what they're watching here.

One of the reasons for this is lack of character development. On paper, all these characters sound great. Pervo the Clown is a perverted clown who loves banging women. Skye Brannigan is an edgy rock singer who kicks ass once she learns her sister is still alive. The Zander family are a bunch of kooks who run a cult and uses their members as lab rats. Just typing that makes ZOMBIE WOMEN OF SATAN sound more interesting than it actually is. We know nothing about these characters because we're given nothing. Yeah, they all do things within the film that makes them stand apart from each other in a stereotypical fashion, but all horror films do that. We get no back stories for these characters. They don't really change from beginning to end. They do things that leave me bored, uninterested, or confused because they come off as one-dimensional rather than actual people. Most zombie films work well because the protagonists are colorful, fleshed-out, and actually behave in ways that we can understand and relate to them. Since I have no opportunity to know these characters on more than just a superficial level, why should I, or anyone else, care?

The lack of character development stems from the fact that nothing is really explained in detail. Henry performs these experiments on these girls behind Tycho's back. Why? What is his purpose for doing this? Is he trying to bring a loved one back to life? No. Does he want to play God? Not sure because nothing in the film is able to answer that. It's there because it has to be there for the story to work. Why are there zombies? Because Henry is making them. But I couldn't tell you why.

Same goes to the rest of his family. The Zanders are a really kooky bunch, and if they were three-dimensional, they could have been great characters. The problem is that we don't know why they do the things they do. Why is Tycho running a cult when he seems to be pretty made as a TV internet host? Yeah, he's banging all the girls in the cult but what else is there? Why is his mother chained to a wall in Henry's lab? She's obviously insane, but was she like that before being the family's prisoner? Did Henry do that to her in an experiment? All I know about this woman is that she lost more than few marbles, begs Henry to touch and fuck her [I'm not kidding - she does this on more than one occasion to an annoyingly degree], and enjoys kissing her son while watching him bang a zombie, which was filmed on a video camera by his father, Henry. And I won't go into Red and Blue, who just seem indifferent about the whole incestuous situation as if it's normal. These are all interesting developments in a screenplay, but they're nothing without any sort of explanation behind them. I'm not supposed to take things for a grain of salt. I'm supposed to understand why things are happening the way they're supposed to in this film by a good screenwriter explaining to me through well-developed scenes and/or dialogue.

The other group of characters are no strangers to this either. Pervo the Clown brings women to his hotel room, plays Twister with them, and supposedly sleeps with them. Johnny Hellfire is annoyed by Pervo's behavior, yet takes one of his girls to his room. What does he do with her? Ties her to a chair as he duct tapes her mouth, while two other women wearing gas masks are sitting and watching the show.

What the fuck am I supposed to do with that??? What does this mean? Why are these characters doing this?

Also, it seems Pervo has a thing for Johnny, as he actually masturbates to a photo of him after an argument, trying to convince himself that he isn't gay. Not once was this subplot ever brought up beforehand or even played out in a way that it comes off as natural rather than a joke that misfires in every single way. Having just the punchline doesn't make people laugh. It just pisses them off.

Speaking of a shitty joke, there's literally a close to ten minute sequence of Zeus taking a dump in the woods as a zombie chases after him. I'm not kidding. He takes two minutes to find a damn spot, and then another five or six to push it out. And of course, we get all the poop sounds for those without the benefit of being deaf or dumb. And did I forget to mention that the last moment of this sequence is actually seeing his poop steaming on the grass in a close-up? It's not funny. It doesn't move the story along. It's not like DATE MOVIE, where Jinxers the Cat takes that massive dump in the toilet. That's funny because it's a puppet cat, it's out-of-the-blue and gives the cat some character [as juvenile as it is], and doesn't last ten fuckin' minutes! I could see something stupid like this in a spoof film. This type of filler doesn't belong in a zombie horror film.

Hell, most of the film is filled with jokes like these. Some might make you chuckle slightly at how stupid they are, but most of them will just make you make you wish you were watching something else. Oh look at Pervo wearing nipple tassels on his ass while he takes a pee! Are Pervo and Johnny making fun of each other with the unfunniest disses ever? Awesome! Golly, how funny is watching the characters playing with the zombie's boobs rather than killing her? I'm dying all right, but it isn't from laughter. The funniest part of the film was watching a zombie go after a victim in a wheelchair. At least that was memorable for all the right reasons, unlike 95 percent of this film. I guess I sold my sense of humor to Satan to watch this movie. I'm definitely asking for a refund.

As for the dialogue, let's just say that I almost thought Rob Zombie had written it. If there was a drinking game for the number of F-bombs that were dropped during this movie, I'd be dead from alcohol poisoning. And they're used just because the word "fuck" is edgy and dangerous, man! I also "love" that Skye's battle cry after each kill is "You bitch!" How clever.

Look, I'm not looking for David Mamet here. But every filmmaker should put some effort into their script. Just because you have a small budget doesn't mean you should have a small script. The screenplay has to be the best thing about this type of film. Unfortunately, it's the worst thing about it, which ruins the entire experience. If there was some actually care and polish during the writing process, this film could have been pretty great because there are actual moments here that could have led to really effective and memorable scenes. But I guess since the filmmakers figured that cussing and displaying boobs every three minutes would make up for that. Silly me.

Speaking of boobs, ZOMBIE WOMEN OF SATAN is full of them. At least this distracted me from being completely bored. I have to thank that one zombie whose fun bags were so huge, that I'm surprised she didn't knock herself out while running. Her children will be so lucky when they're born. Sure, it's a bit sexist since [besides Pervo, who is shirtless and has an ass shot] pretty much all the zombie women are nude to some extent. But that sexism is the only thing that doesn't feel forced in this film. So I'll take it and enjoy it as little as I can. How do you think I managed to watch this film for 90 minutes? The story? Psh!

The gore isn't great, but there's a lot of red stuff here. Unfortunately, the FX isn't all that convincing and most of the deaths take place off screen. As a matter of fact, most of these zombies die to massive blows to the head. And when we do see them die in other ways, you can clearly tell it's a mannequin getting it. It's a low budget, so that's understandable. But that's why a stronger script was needed here. This only adds to how bad this film really is.

The direction by both Steve O'Brien and Warren Speed is unimpressive. The camera work annoyed me more times than I could count. It shook a whole lot during the fight scenes. The editing is terrible. There were a lot of shots from the ground that, I guess, was supposed to create some sort of creepy effect, but it just comes off as amateur. Slow motion is also used here, but it's done in unoriginal ways. Even the timing and pacing is off. Not a visual masterpiece, that's for sure.

The acting was okay. I won't get into everyone, but they all did fine with what they were given. I thought Seymour Mace, Warren Speed, Christian Steel, and Victoria Hopkins were the better actors here for all different reasons. It would have been nice if they had better material at their disposal, but apparently these Zombie Women don't believe in that.

THINGS I'VE LEARNED WHILE REALIZING THAT THE ONLY SATANIC THING ABOUT THIS FILM ARE THE 85 MINUTES OF HELL I SACRIFICED WATCHING IT

- Henry's wife constantly begged him, "Touch me! Touch me!" Ew, she is no Samantha Fox! Still, "Naughty Girls Need Love Too".

- Pervo the Clown, The World's Greatest Knife Thrower, didn't throw any, taking his assistant, Harmony Starr, away instead. I guess he'll feed her his sword backstage then...

- Tycho renamed one of the cult girls "Zed". Well, she does make his "monster" grow...

- A bunch of girls turned into zombies after drinking some spiked Kool-Aid. Next time, more sugar and less Trioxin. Oh yeah!

- Tycho used golf club to kill a zombie. Before you swing and score, you must yell "Fore!" before nailing that whore. Tiger Woods would be proud.

- Tycho screwed a zombie while his dad videotaped it for Tycho's mom. Incest AND necrophilia - looks like this family tajes the game of Taboo a bit too seriously...

THE FINAL HOWL
I watch films looking for the good rather than the bad. This is especially true for low budget horror films. But doing that for ZOMBIE WOMEN OF SATAN is pretty much an impossible task. It's not the worst film I've seen, but it's pretty close. I can forgive the cheap looking gore and special effects. I can forgive the really campy acting. But I can't forgive a horrible script, which should be the main focus for any low budget movie. And with terrible direction as well, I can't recommend this film to anyone at all - unless you like really lame, juvenile humor and a dwarf taking a dump for 10 minutes. If you want to watch a true zombie-comedy from the UK, stick with SHAUN OF THE DEAD. I'm sending ZOMBIE WOMEN OF SATAN to the WTF? Vault, where it can rot for all I care and...

SCORE
0.5 Howls Outta 4

DIRECTED BY
Thunder Levin

STARRING
C. Thomas Howell - David
Tyshawn Bryant - G-Dog
Rachel Montez Collins - Latiffa
Gregory Allan Williams - Dr. Reginald Monte
Johanna Watts - Lisa
Robert Wu - Dragon
KeiKabou Holland - Larson
Maxie J. Santillan Jr. - Old Man

Genre - Horror/Comedy/Zombies

Running Time - 90 Minutes

Score - 3 Howls Outta 4


I spent quite some time in the 'hood, being from Brooklyn, New York. I've seen gang violence. I've seen drug dealing. I've seen some bad stuff go down. But never...and I do mean NEVER...have I've witnessed mutant vampire zombies in my 'hood.

Unless you count stoners. Then yes, I have seen MUTANT VAMPIRE ZOMBIES FROM THE 'HOOD. Anyway, read the review before I pop a cap in yo' ass, homey!

PLOT
In South Central, Los Angeles, a cop named David (C. Thomas Howell) and his partner hide out at the rafters of a warehouse where two rival gangs are meeting. The leader of the black gang, G-Dog (Tyshawn Bryant), wants to exchange drugs with the Asian gang leader, Dragon (Robert Wu), for his girl Latiffa (Rachel Montez Collins). The police bust goes bad, as David and his partner are outnumbered. While a shoot out occurs between the three groups, a huge solar flare hits Earth. Everyone in the warehouse is knocked unconscious because of it.

They all wake up hours later, only to find that the world has drastically changed. The solar flare seems to have mutated anyone in contact with it [meaning whoever was outdoors during the event] with its radiation, turning them into flesh-eating, blood-hungry zombies. The three rival gangs unite to take out this new species as they head to the safety of an astrophysicist (Gregory Allan Williams) and his really hot daughter (Johanna Watts), who seem to have the key to stopping these creatures and staying alive.

REVIEW
Now you may all be thinking: "With a title like MUTANT VAMPIRE ZOMBIES FROM THE 'HOOD, this film must really suck!", right? Fortunately, MVZFTH is actually a pretty good flick! It's funny. It's well-acted. And for a very low budget feature, it looks pretty damn cool! Who knew?

The screenplay for WVZFTH is surprisingly smart and well-written in general. Obviously, the film isn't original in its storytelling. If you've seen NIGHT OF THE LIVING DEAD or other popular zombie movies, you know how things supposed to go.

A: Some strange substance [gas, virus, solar flare] turns people into flesh-craving creatures.

B: A group of survivors who don't see eye-to-eye encounter these creatures, wondering what caused them and doing anything in their power to live.

C: They all group up in a safe place, disagreeing with how to do things to maintain their survival.

D: The creatures break into this safe place, putting the survivors' alliances to the test.

MVZFTH runs the same way, pretty much. It takes elements of NIGHT OF THE LIVING DEAD, mixed with NIGHT OF THE COMET, with an added sprinkle of 28 DAYS LATER to complete the stew. And it actually works for the most part. Not only are these films referenced, but so are NOSFERATU, ALIENS, and SNAKES ON A PLANE to various degrees of success. In fact, the Larson character [G-Dog's right hand man] is the Bill Paxton role from ALIENS, who's always terrified by the situation and rants about horror movies to express his points. These self-references shouldn't work as well as they do, but I found myself laughing at most of them. Color me surprised.

The dialogue is also pretty well written. The comedy is actually funny and there's hardly any exposition. When characters say something, the words actually move the story forward. There are also moments where stereotypes are thrown at certain characters, playing around with them to a great and comedic effect. The screenplay was really well-paced and I never felt all that bored once the zombies showed up within 20 minutes of the movie. I will say that the characters aren't all that developed and it would have been nice to know more about them so, as an audience, we could care about them and their fates. A little more depth would have been nice but it doesn't really hurt the film all that much at the end.

The special effects of MVZFTH are more than decent. The SFX and makeup were done by American Makeup and Effects, who have worked on all three PIRATE OF THE CARIBBEAN films and JARHEAD. The zombies look pretty good and the gore is pretty nice as well. We get a lot of gun shots and necks being bitten by zombies. Not too shabby at all. For a low budget movie, it was nice to see that the money was spent on the right things.

The direction by Thunder Levin was also nicely handled. The movie was well-paced with its tight editing. The cinematography was pretty nice. The fight sequences were nicely choreographed and pretty exciting. They weren't perfect but I enjoyed them. I really can't say anything negative about the visuals in this movie. The film looked really good and also sounded really good. Thunder Levin is no hack, that's for sure. Definitely thumbs up from me.

The acting was also decent for the most part. C. Thomas Howell does more than well here as the lead. I've always liked the guy since the 1980s and it's too bad he doesn't have a better career. He's a talented actor and I enjoyed him here. His moments where he would try and act black reminded me of SOUL MAN, which made me nostalgic. Tyshawn Bryant was more than capable as G-Dog. He was the stereotypical black gang member, but he put more depth into a thinly written character than what was needed. Good job. Robert Wu was also good as Dragon. He had certain emotional moments that he handled well. KeiKabou Holland was a highlight as Larson. His rants about NOSFERATU were very funny and he made the film more entertaining overall. Gregory Allan Williams, or Baywatch fame, brought class to his role. Johanna Watts as Lisa was extremely hot AND could act! That only made her sexier in my book. And Maxie J. Santillan Jr., as the old man who acted as the sage for the group, was entertaining as well. Just a really capable cast. Not one weak link here.

THINGS I'VE LEARNED WHILE BANGING A HOT DOCTOR IN FRONT OF THE UNDEAD

- David's partner criticized him for talking and acting "black". Obviously, he was one of the many people who was smart enough NOT to see SOUL MAN back in the 80s.

- David claims that his job as a cop is to know every criminal on the streets by their names. Yeah, if there are no donut shops or plungers around! However, if you like forceful entries in the rectum region, then please ignore this one.

- G-Dog said the zombies can do everything but "skull fuck" people "with their atomic dicks." I totally agree. Only Lois Lane has knowledge of this experience and it should stay that way.

- Lisa is a great marksman. Any chick who can master a gun goes on top of my list...and my lap.

- None of the survivors want to have sex with zombies, afraid their appendages might be mutiliated because of hunger. Although lesbians probably welcome their carpets being munched...

- Larson got his penis bit off by a zombie. I guess someone needed a penis transplant...

- Lisa has a thing for David and vice-versa. Hot chicks dig THE OUTSIDERS, even if their 15 minutes of fame have already run out and then some.

THE FINAL HOWL
While not a perfect film [the ending was way rushed, some plot holes, and a very slow and unoriginal beginning], MUTANT VAMPIRE ZOMBIES FROM THE 'HOOD is still a surprisingly fun time. If you are interested in seeing this film and want to see how a low budget zombie film should look like, check out their website at Seminal Films. Apparently there is another installment called NINJA PIRATE WEREWOLVES IN 'SPACE - a film I'm actually looking forward to. How can you not with a title like that? But in the meantime, take a look at MVZFTH. It may leave you starving for more.

“We’re not gonna make it, humans I mean.”

“It is in your nature to destroy yourselves.”

-Edward Furlong & Arnold Schwarzenegger from “T2”

There was a 20 year gap between George Romero’s “Day Of The Dead” and his “Land Of The Dead.” Some parents now have kids who are slightly older than the number of years Romero sought financing to make zombie movies on his own terms. But since “Land Of The Dead,” this director has been pumping out one living dead movie every other year. Talk about sudden productivity. His latest flesh eating opus is “Survival Of The Dead” which looks at the rivalry of two families on an isolated island, struggling to maintain power as the zombies continue to outnumber them and reject their vegan ways.

Actually, we first get introduced to a group of mercenary National Guardsmen who were briefly introduced in “Diary Of The Dead” when they stole supplies from the protagonists who were riding along in their old Winnebago. These soldiers are lead by Sarge “Nicotine” Crockett (Alan van Sprang), and they are now on their own, struggling to survive in a god forsaken world. As a result, “Survival Of The Dead” is the closest thing to a direct sequel that this series has ever had.

Click here to read the full review

Film Arcade recently gotten ahold of courtesy of Magnet Releasing, the official poster and trailer for George E. Romero's latest film "Survival of the Dead", which is available on demand now and hits theaters on May 28th

Immediately following the events of Diary of the Dead, SURVIVAL OF THE DEAD is the 6th film from George A. Romero to look at a world where humans are in the minority and the zombies rule.

Off the coast of Delaware sits the cozy Plum Island where two families are locked in a struggle for power, as it has been for generations. The O'Flynn's, headed by patriarch Patrick O'Flynn (Kenneth Welsh) approach the zombie plague with a shoot-to-kill attitude. The Muldoons, headed by Shamus Muldoon (Richard Fitzpatrick), feel that the zombies should be quarantined and kept 'alive,' in hopes that a solution will someday be found.

The O'Flynn's, who are clearly outnumbered, are forced to exile Patrick by boat to the mainland, where he meets up with a band of soldiers, headed by Guardsman Sarge (Alan Van Sprang). They join forces and return to the island, to find that the zombie plague has fully gripped the divided community.

As the battle between humans and zombies escalates, the master filmmaker continues to reinvent the modern horror genre with wicked humor and pointed social commentary.

You can find the list of theaters for "Survival of the Dead" at: http://www.magpictures.com/dates.aspx?id=1c0598da-4edb-4d15-949f-76b19b5e6904

"Survival of the Dead": Official Trailer

Zombieland
Year: 2009
Director: Ruben Fleischer
Studio: Columbia Pictures
Stars: Jessie Eisenberg, Woody Harrelson, Emma Stone
MPAA Rating: R
Running Time: 80 Mins





The zombie genre has exploded in the last five years with “Dawn of the Dead (remake)” “28 Weeks Later”, “Shaun of the Dead”, “Dead Snow”, George Romero’s upcoming “Survival of the Dead” and the “Resident Evil” sequels. Now here’s the latest entry “Zombieland”.

The film is about Columbus, a geeky nerd (Jessie Eisenberg), who lives by a set of rules in mist of a zombie apocalypse. While walking in the middle of the highway, he meet up with Tallahassee (Woody Harrelson), a gun toting zombie killer with a fond for twinkles. On their cross- country adventure, they hook up a pair of sisters (Emma Stone, Abigail Breslin) who are running scams, while surviving this zombie mayhem. Soon they don’t know is what’s worse, trying to survive a zombie apocalypse or trying to survive with each other.

There are some films that don’t attempt to have a plot or any of the elements that you can recommend, but afterward you come out of theater saying that you had a fun time. This was the case with “Zombieland”. This is no Shaun of the Dead by no means, but I couldn’t help myself enjoy the film for what it is.

Ruben Fleischer’s direction was good enough to make this a fun guilty pleasure film. The way he directs the action scenes help this film become a fun one to watch. Fleischer directs them in quick and rapid style that helps makes the scenes feel like that you are actually watching a full-fledged horror film. But makes this film successful is the way he directs the comedy scenes. I liked how he adds title card repeatedly, when you come across one of the rules that the main character lives by. It got kind of redundant at first but once the humor clicked, it became funny. He does a very good job creating chemistry be Jessie Eisenberg and Woody Harrelson (who is very funny here). The chemistry between the actors is probably the key thing that makes this very fun. If the chemistry between the two main actors failed, then this probably would have been a hard film to sit through.

Rhett Reese and Paul Wernick’s screenplay was average for the most part. There were things that I liked with this screenplay. First, I liked how they named each of the main characters based on a city. It adds to the humorous element that is in the film already and makes you get into the story, if you figure the joke second. Second, their strongest writing came at a point in the film where the celebrity cameo (which I will not spoil) happens. That was about a good ten minutes where the four are at his house and they find him still alive. It was my favorite part of the film, because the writing there was funny and got most laughs out of me during any part of the film. Finally, it doesn’t take itself to seriously, as it tries to be it’s own movie and not other “Shaun of the Dead” clone.

The screenplay has its problems though. I thought there was little character or story development, as it made me what to know more about what happen in the beginning. Maybe if they set this film around the time the zombie invasion started, this would have been something special, instead of a guilty pleasure film. Also, I would have liked to have seen some scenes written a little longer, because this felt like a fast film at eighty minutes. Hopefully, they will correct that for the inevitable sequel.

“Zombieland” is no “Shaun of the Dead”, but if you are looking for a fun time at the cinema, then this is movie for you.

Review Rating: Three and a Half Stars.

Dod Sno
Aka: Dead Snow
Director: Tommy Wirkola
Studio: IFC Films
Stars: Vegar Hoel, Stig Frode Henriksen, Charlotte Frogner
MPAA Rating: Not Rated
Running Time: 91 Mins








2009 has been a very good year for the horror genre. There has been a lot great horror out there, like “I Sell the Dead”, “Drag Me to Hell”, “Martyrs”, and “Rec” to name a few. Well you can add “Dead Snow” to that list of great horror films of 2009.

The film starts with eight medical students, as they are on vacation on the ski slopes near Olsfjord. They stop at a small cabin to drink and party all night long. They soon meet an old man that interrupts their night of fun. . He tells them the history of how the Nazis were torturing and abusing the locals. Soon the medical students find a box of gold that belonged to them back in that era. Now, a group of Nazi zombies want that gold back, which leads to a showdown between them and the medical students.

“Dead Snow’ is Norway’s answer to “The Evil Dead”. This was a very fun movie to watch. The reason for that was Writer/Director Tommy Wirkola’s ability to make this film very scary and fun, as this is the most fun, I’ve had watching a foreign horror film in a quite a while. The reason the fun level works, Wirkola builds up the tension leading to the death scenes. He builds them up with false scares and some campiness to the introduction of the characters. It sets up this fun and gory ride that persists through out the whole film. Worlola also gets into the eyes of action, as they are a couple of scenes, where you are seeing the action through a zombie soldier’s eyes. By doing that, it builds up to their onscreen presence, as you don’t want to know what they look like, right away, as it takes away from the frightening aspects.

Also, the deaths scenes were very creative and inventive. If you going into seeing a horror movie like this, you want the deaths to be as something that you haven’t seen before. There are a couple of deaths that you would never see in any other zombie movie, but this one. It makes the action very intense and fun.

The acting in this film, also added to the insanity that made this film very fun. Wirkola does a very good making the performance come of as campy and funny at times. Its needed to keep up the insane action, in order for it to be successful and not come off as just another horror film.

The Screenplay written by Wikola and Stig Frode Henriksen does delivering on its intended purpose, to entertain the hell out of you. They do that, by setting everything up from the characters, to the deaths, to the final bloody showdown. By doing that, it grabs the viewer for the ride. Another thing that was good about this screenplay, the way they introduce the zombies. You don’t see them on screen right away; it takes about half way through before you see them fully. The screenwriters did that so it builds suspense. All this insane action is well and good but if you don’t have suspense build into the story, then the film loses its insanity.

This is the most fun I’ve had watching a foreign horror film, in quite a while. This is definitely a horror film that you should definitely check it. Dead Snow in fun and insane zombie film that will please zombie lovers alike.

“Dead Snow” is currently in limited release and on IFC On Demand. Check your local cable provider for more information

Tuesday Morning
Year: 2008
Director: Luke Ramer
Stars: Brain Dibonaventre, Darlene Curcio, Katie Smith
MPAA Rating: Not Rated
Studio: West 2nd Productions
Running Time: 40 Mins

Tuesday Morning is a low budget zombie short about a young couple who are having issues in their relationship including an pregnancy which one of them doesn’t want. They must put aside their issues, when they discover that zombie are walking among them. Soon they must try to escape their house and outrun the zombies before them and their unborn child ends up dead.

When reviewing films that have played in the festival circuit or films that are short in length, you never know what to expect. That’s the fun of being a critic on one of these sites. Going into this film, I didn’t know what to expect, as I originally thought that this was a slasher film, but instead this was a zombie film. Oops, as I’m not the biggest zombie lover in the world, but when I see an interesting concept, I usually go for it. Thankfully, I didn’t have to regret the fact that I made the mistake, as I really enjoyed this film a lot, even though it looked like a camcorder film and had the budget of $700.00 dollars.

Tuesday Morning is a surprising scary for a very low budgeted camcorder film. Director Luke Ramer’s direction was pretty good giving the fact that this film was really low budgeted. He does a good job keeping the action moving, as none of the scenes that were shot were either cheesy or felt like it came out of a backyard film. The gore effects were very good, as there was blood flowing in this zombie film. Ramer also manages make the action scenes in the film intense, which a very good thing if you filmmakers out there are short on money. But one of things that he accomplished was making this little film scary. This is what I want to see in these films. I wish the major studios would watch these little films and see what horror fans want. Ramer’s direction of the actors was also surprisingly good. The performances felt believable and he made sure that the chemistry was dead on.

Ramer’s screenplay was also good, as it also made the film very enjoyable. His screenplay really does a good job developing the relationship between the two main characters here. I thought that the set up with those characters helped contribute to me liking this film because in movies like this, you have care for the characters in order for a movie to succeed. I cared about the relationship to the point that I felt a little heartbroken at the end of the film, which I’ll talk about in a minute. The scares were surprisingly there in the screenplay. Ramer does a very good job in setting them up, as they gave me shivers my spine. He also get his message across, especially with the end of the film which I won’t go into further, as it would spoil the ending, but it did leave me with an impact, which most films of this genre don’t. This is why I prefer these horror films instead of the crap that the major studios put out.

Tuesday Morning is a zombie film that is character driven and scary.

Review Rating: 4 Stars

aka Zibahkhana

Director: Omar Khan

Cast: Ashfaq Bhatti, Sultan Billa, Osman Khalid Butt, Rubya Chaudhry

Danger After Dark (TLA Releasing) / Urdu and English Language with English Subtitles / 78 min / Anamorphic Widescreen (1.78:1) 5.1 Dolby Digital / NTSC Region 1 / Not Rated

A group of kids on their way to a concert run out of gas and run into trouble. From scary old people, to pollution mutants and a burqa wearing, spiked mace wielding maniac, these young people have one shitty trip. They are warned by the old people about treading on "zibahkhana" or "hell's ground" but of course they don't heed it because, well, they read the script. After running over an apparent zombie/mutant and running out of gas, the teens are stalked by a killer, a nutty hitch-hiker and their loony mother. (READ MORE!)

aka Non si deve profanare il sonno dei morti
aka Let Sleeping Corpses Lie

Director: Jorge Grau

Cast: Cristina Galbó, Ray Lovelock, Arthur Kennedy

Blue Underground / 1974 / Not Rated / NTSC Region 0 / Widescreen (1.85:1/16x9) / 5.1 Dolby Digital Surround, Dolby Surround 2.0, Original Mono

Extras:
- Back To The Morgue: Locations Featurette with Director Jorge Grau
- Zombie Fighter: Interview with Star Ray Lovelock
- Zombie Maker: Interview with Sepcial Effects Artist Giannetto De Rossi
- 2000 Interview with Director Jorge Grau
- International Trailer
- U.S. Trailer
- TV Spot
- Radio Spot
- Poster & Still Gallery

Edna is on her way to see her sister when she has an accident and backs over George's motorcycle. She agrees to give him a ride to his destination but along the way, Edna is confronted by what seems to be the walking dead. Dead, mutilated bodies begin to turn up all around town, but no one believes that the zombies are responsible. So the two are pursued and investigated by the local police after they are suspected of the gruesome crimes. But only George and Edna know the real truth. (READ MORE)

NOTE: imdb and other sites list this movie as 2008. The correct date, as I listed it, is 2007.

Writer: Jeffrey Reddick (Dawson's Creek, Felicity, Halloween H20)

Director: Steve Miner (the Final Destination "Thrillogy", Tamara)

Stars: Mena Suvari, Ving Rhames, Nick Cannon

Don't shit your pants because you are about to explode about your righteous indignation towards another remake. First off, it's lame to be closed off to a movie because you think the retelling is going to somehow taint the original. Second, this movie is no more a remake than The Burning is a remake of Friday the 13th. They are the retelling of a basic premise and that's what this is...except they plugged in the name of a Romero classic. (READ MORE)